Bought at a Price

Here I am up way too late... So many thoughts in my head tonight. I had my first St. Patty's Day green beer at a dive bar in town. While sitting at the bar, I distracted myself from getting hit on by the locals by texting a guy I had had coffee with several weeks prior.

Tall, sexy, Christian, he and I flirted back and forth for a good hour. I wondered why he hadn't called me for a real date after coffee. We were set up by a mutual acquaintance through church.

At some point in the conversation, he mentioned he had his "vices." AKA this meant that although he enjoyed texting me, he could not actually date me because, while my stance on sex before marriage was "admirable," he did not have the will power to wait for marriage. All this via text. It was a bit of a buzz kill.

Coming home, I got into a great conversation with my girlfriend who has been crashing on my couch. She sauteed pot stickers--the best food when you come home after a few drinks. She surprised me with her admission. "Michele, I took me SO long to realize that guys are just 'borrowing' you because you are there. I envy you, that you stopped having sex."

Whine... I am envied and celibate, while others are out there having sex and living how they want to. I have to remember that my body is not my own. I was bought at a price. I am not my own, I was bought at a price. I need to keep repeating this and write it on my bathroom mirror so I can repeat it to myself everyday. I hear the Holy Spirit whisper to me, just like He always does..."I have more in store for you, Precious..." I just need to stop thinking so much and listen.